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DMB
SNOBBERY CUTS BOTH WAYS by Gianni RandomSchtuff LOS ANGELES May 2003 -- Tragic facts about rock star Dave Matthews: 1. Named "Male Acoustic Guitarist
of the Year" for two years in a row. * * * * * Opinion: I'm not surprised that a talentless artist such as Dave Matthews sells millions of records because, in fact, most of the people that sell millions of records pretty much suck. My problem is this: Dave Matthews fans are spreading. It seems as if shallow girls and frat boys with shiny jeeps and baseball caps are no longer the only DMB fans. This fucker has now somehow infiltrated and convinced good people that like good music, of this: That he is good. Case in Point #1: You're hangin' out, talking to this cute girl, and the conversation is flowin'. You bring up music, and she's into some of the same shit as you. You're stoked, it's almost too good to be true! Suddenly, her eyes light up and she passionately reveals to you how "this one Dave Matthews song" ... does it for her. The bubble is burst. Rather than express your true feelings about DMB, you turn quiet and withdrawn. You feel guilty for being such a music snob. It's a CLASSIC fuct scenario that has happened too many times. Case in Point #2: You're at a small gathering with a seemingly cool crew. Someone unexpectedly throws DMB in the player. Soon they can sense your dislike of DMB from a subtle facial expression. Finally someone pipes up and says, "What's up, dude? You don't like Dave?" Instead of getting into some no-win music debate, you shrink back with a simple reply that, "He's alright." Conclusion: As observed, it is NOT cool to NOT like Dave Matthews. Readers must stay aware of this new and dangerous Dave Matthews social faux pas. But I know there are at least three people in this world that feel the way I do about DMB, and I pray there are more. Dave Matthews, stop infiltrating our scene, and stop making your gullible, brainwashed followers believe with such vigor that you are a good musician. ---- Reader Comments From: Jeremy Mooer (Ft. Collins, CO) In response to the DMB article, I'd like to say that I agree and disagree. I've studied music and would have to say that, while the violinist's solos are bland and annoying at best, the overall sound of the band is decent. I've never purchased an album, nor listened to them on a regular basis, nor consider myself a fan. BUT, compared to about 90% of the stuff that IS pop music, they are thousands of times more musical and have a great sense of direction. Gianni, why don't you give us a list of your favs? I'm interested what it is you think constitutes good music. ----- From: Ralph Corse (Kansas City, MO) The statement “It is not cool to not like Dave Matthews” is right on the money. This guy is now becoming a favorite for all teeny boppers, let alone every frat/ coed in the country. He hit his peak at 1994’s “under the table” and I for one haven’t seen the appeal since. Great article, hopefully a Dave fan won’t try and kill me for agreeing with you. ----- From: Manuel R. Jovel I agree completely. The Dave Matthews band is little
more than uninspired shlock that appeals to the lowest bracket of
college-aged IQ holders. The music is bland, lacks passion or integrity,
and is intended only as background noise for sandal-wearing frat
boys and sorority sluts everywhere. ----- From: Josh Stella Nice mag. Keep up the good work. There is no band I disdain more than DMB because of the fraudulent nature of their sound (selling "alternativeness" to poseurs who cannot tell the difference). ABBA had more conviction and talent than Dave. Go pick up a Rattlemouth CD if you want legitimate underground progressive rock from Richmond and find out where Dave got the couple ideas he managed to steal and reinterpret ad nauseum to the Amstel Light crowd. ----- From: "Sean Falese" I totally agree that Dave Matthews is awful. I just heard on the radio a "solo" project he has done, and the song was utterly terrible. The production was bad. The lyrics were worse. It was called "Gravedigger" and I really thought that it could have been the worst song of all time. He is so talentless and this "solo project"
just proved it to me. The only thing that makes Dave Matthews' music
even listenable is his back-up band. I ----- From: Anthony Robinson Hey, I really appreciate you bringing up this topic. You are so right. Dave Matthews is a stuck-up prick that whines in his trite and jaded "songs". He is an awful excuse for music, and his infiltration of society is so true and has happened many a time. ESPECIALLLY number 1. Me and this girl I really like are both into Simon and Garfunkel big time, and S&G is respectable music. But then she talks about DMB and I'm just screwed, so, thank you again. And I am sad to say that I am one of very few in my High School that think as I do, and its unfortunate to have such cool people zombified by this mindless dribble. Thanks. ----- From: Chris Oakes Dear Gianni, Know how I found your site? By Googling for "people who like Dave Matthews" and variations thereof. My purpose: a quasi-panicked quest to find an authoritative biopsy of the social cancer that is spreading in the form of the Dave Matthews Band. I was especially looking for an apt fan description, since I have as much a problem with some of the fans -- mainly the late-30s/early-40s male professional version -- as I do with the Dave that gratifies them so. You know that thing Dave does with with his voice -- all falsetto and, like, "soaring" (as some critic has no doubt adoringly described it). Well -- all I can do is shiver like I do sometimes after a whiz in bar-bathrooms. I'm pretty sure when Dave goes a-soaring, most of his sandal-wearing, mellow-but-professional fan-dudes feel roughly "spiritual" at that moment -- yet also rather refined in their musical tastes. The positive thought- vibes make them sway a little more soulfully to that snappy, hollow, plastic-body strumming. They're cool now to wait for the joint to come back around, once Steve from marketing finishes his semi-bogarting toke. But nevermind -- the grass of "Shoreline" [insert Generic Amphitheater with lawn] and Dave -- well guys, it doesn't get any better than this. Outside of the college crowd, some of my assumptions/ hunches about most Dave Matthews fans: - They enjoy rollerblading. So, thank you. Your points were funny and spot on. And Josh Stella's reader comment was especially gratifying and provided the kind of descriptive detail I needed: "DMB ended up playing free shows almost every summer Friday night at an outdoor venue in the new yuppie office park side of town where the banks and insurance companies had set up shop." But best of all: "ABBA had more conviction and talent than Dave." Hear, hear. P.S. This thing about them being good musicians? Well, the fact is that the average good musician makes for high-grade crap when it comes to pop music. Half the time studio musicians suck the soul out of a song as bad as those poor dudes who've resigned themselves to the purgatory of Paul Shaffer's band on Late Night with David Letterman. I mean it works for that show, but musically -- keep those guys away from your recording studio. How Warren Zevon stood them, I'll never know. ----- From: Seth Forster Yeah, it's a problem, the whole DMB thing...but
there are ways around it. For example, when someone asks you a question
concerning "Dave" (since they seem to be oblivious to
the band, who by the way, are much more skillful, if uninspired
musicians), you can respond by saying something to the effect of,
"Yeah, I love Bowie. He's not as good as he used to be."
Or make a David Crosby reference, or any other Dave will do, particularly
Dave Edmunds of Rockpile. ----- From: Ben Perkins In my opinion, the Dave Matthews Band is the most overrated band in the world today. Maybe in 2005 there will be another, but for now DMB has no rival in that category. What gets me is that people somehow equate his music with talent or deep thought-provoking songs. My wife has good taste musically, but her one big mistake, musically speaking, is coming under the spell of Dave Matthews. (Let me just say that I respect my wife's musical likes and dislikes. And everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And I know she probably thinks a lot of the music I like is horseshit.) My wife has long been a big fan of DMB, but I never really paid much attention, or even knew of any of their songs. Then, in the spring of 2000, I started noticing all this press DMB was getting about their upcoming album: internet, newspaper, cover of Time, etc. Shortly after the new album came out, I bought the CD for my wife, but didn't give it much thought, except that I couldn't stand that awful song, "A space between." What finally got me was when several co-workers were talking about an upcoming DMB concert at the Gorge Amphitheatre (in Washington State) where Dave and the boys play several concerts each summer. My supervisor, a fifty-year-old man, was talking excitedly with them about what a great concert it was going to be. I decided at that point to listen to some of my wife's DMB CDs, and see what all the fuss was about. After listening to some of the CDs, watching videos, and trying to get into the music, I can honestly say that Dave Matthews' music really sucks. It is downright awful. I don't understand how people can listen to this stuff. Over here in Seattle, Dave Matthews is worshipped like he's some godlike figure. As if the arrogant folks of Seattle should be so fortunate to see Dave perform in his prime. As if 100 years from now, Dave will be remembered as some legendary music pioneer. As for Dave's fans, with all due respect to my wife, I agree that he seems to attract the obnoxious, arrogant frat boy, sorority bitch type of crowd. He also attracts the snot-nosed yuppies who think their coolness level is elevated because they are into Dave's cool sound. You see a lot of this kind of crowd in Seattle, one of the most overrated, arrogant, snotty cities in the country. If someone gets a lot of airplay and publicity, their music usually has some redeeming qualities. (For example, I am not a fan of Justin Timberlake, but in all fairness, his solo album does have some good songs, even though some of it is fluff. And I can see where his music would get heavy airplay on mainstream radio.) But I can't find any good qualities in Dave's music. His music is horrible, plain and simple. I don't know of any songs by him that I can listen to for more than 10 seconds. As far as his band goes, they seem average at best. That violinist (Boyd Tinsley) seems to be highly regarded by a lot of people, but he's the most annoying part of Dave's group. If Dave got rid of that violin music, his songs would still suck, but it would still be a dramatic improvement over the unlistenable horseshit he's currently generating. I wouldn't be as critical of DMB if it were not for the constant hype over his latest move, and the arrogance of his growing legion of fans. I would put DMB's music at about the same level of Hootie and the Blowfish. But that's too much of an insult to Darius and the boys. At least Hootie and the Blowfish knew not to take themselves too seriously. (And their music was more listenable than Dave's ever will be.) Now I hear that Dave's got a new solo album coming out, and so we'll have to endure another onslaught of Dave mania. And the Seattle Times-Post Intelligencer newspapers can once again show their incompetence and immaturity by giving Dave and the boys front page exposure and gushing reviews. And God forbid if I have to hear another story of his concert in Central Park for charity. As if he's the only musician who ever did such an event. ----- From: Jason Morrow Mental note: Take her friends' musical recommendations with a grain of salt. Oh my god. I married someone who would be interested in a DMB concert. Must get her on a steady diet of My Morning Jacket and Mates of State. ----- From: Michael Wilde ----- From: Emee Pumarega There's a hilarious song by Don Lennon, "Matthews Comes Alive", that describes the DMB phenomenon dead-on. Find it at: ----- From: Devin Walters Want the truth? I was a FERVENT DMB fan when I heard that Live @ Luther CD. And it was different for me, because I was in 7th grade, far from a sandal wearing yuppie. In fact, Tim's slide solo on Ants Marching is 50% of the reason why I started playing guitar. In retrospect, it was more because of Tim, but Dave's groove just did it for me back then. I went to (counting stubs on my wall) six Dave shows, and the last one ended it all for me. I have since found Phish -- any guitar player/musician will know where I'm going with this now. But, anyway, I was standing there with 1000s of yuppies, and their yuppie girlfriends, and I was just like, what the fuck is this guy doing on stage, and why didn't Ben Harper open for him this year? Because Dave, you are too old, and your sound is
NOT cool anymore. The violin player is a sawing joke of a rock star,
as he plays with his mouth wide open like he's actually expressing
something. Bass player is technically pretty flawless, but he doesn't
bring that much to the table at all. The sax and drummer are the
only two worth listening to. How the hell did white boy Dave get
lucky enough to play with these virtuoso musicians? Dave Matthews,
I beg of you, quit asking Trey Anastasio to do your CDs. If I hear
another blazing solo over your shitty voice, I'm gonna die. ---- From: "Christina Pruett" I for one, whole-heartedly disagree with you. Besides being musically talented, I feel Dave Matthews' lyrics are amazing. I hate the fact that just because he is popular, people hate him. I just graduated college, and at college I have multiple types of friends... But mostly, I hung around the new "hippy" crowd. Now these guys prided themselves on having the best musical tastes. But I for one found that their tastes only depended on, not musical abilities, but what the new underground hippy trend was. Of course, their mainstay was Phish... And they always complained that Dave was a "money-making machine." I'm sure Phish makes no money off of their albums or tours. I love all the critics out there who don't take time to enjoy music that is popular and just thrust it into the suck category. I have no expertise in music, but I know what I like... And I also know that my tastes don't depend on what is popular or unpopular, or cool or uncool. PS: I love the fact that all of the comments listed on your site agree with you. I'm sure that I am the lone person in cyber land to disagree with you. ---- From: "Tom Zinschlag" After reading your article I whole heartedly agree
and it is nice to know that others feel the same way I do that Dave
Matthews is all hype. About a month ago I purchased the Matrix
Reloaded album. My whole opinion of the album changed when I
found out that they allowed a techno remix by Paul Oakenfold of
a song that was already terrible by Dave Matthews. Maybe say Paul
should stick to what he does best: speed racer techno, not remixing
songs by washed-up talentless trendy artists. From: "TERENCE ADAM ROSE" Let me start off by getting a few things out of the way, and a few things off my chest. I am a Dave Matthews Band fan, and yes even a Dave Matthews fan. I am a freshman at PSU. However: I do not drive an SUV, do not belong to a frat, both because I can afford neither, and because I loathe each, and what the hell does the fact that someone, such as I, wears sandals have to do with what kind of music he or she likes? I mean, you never see sandals at Phish concerts or anything, right? A sandal is a piece of footwear for Godsakes. I am sorely disappointed with the amount of people out there who have convinced themselves that they are Cameron Crowe, Peter Travers, or Austin Scaggs, and believe they are experts in the field of critizing music. As previously mentioned, I am a Dave Matthews fan. However, I like and appreciate nearly every kind of music, but I certainly do not feel the need to criticize those who don't. I listen to everything from Robert Randolph and the Family Band to old Snoop Dogg, Rage Against The Machine to Led Zeppelin to Dave Matthews, classical guitar and piano to various forms of jazz and blues, including Medeski Martin and Wood to the delta-blues singer Robert Johnson and John Lee Hooker. So piss off GianniRandomSchtuff, with your overzealous attempts at sounding like a sophisticated and refined music fan. And piss off to all the rest of you who jumped on Mr. Gianni's bandwagon. When decrying the musicianship of someone mega-popular and richer than you'll ever be, perhaps you could provide a little proof to back up your own righteously angry rhetoric, because I have to tell you, you all sound like a bunch of whining highschool students in remedial English. Dave Matthews has a very unorthodox lyrical style, and he is obviously doing something right if guys like Carter Beauford, Tim Reynolds, John Popper, and Trey Anastasio want to share the stage with him. Speaking of Trey Anastasio, and all you rabid Phish fans out there who despise Dave for his colloboration with Trey, I say this: Dave Matthews did not hold a gun to Trey Anastasio's head. A committed guitar player since the seventh grade, I willingly admit Dave's acumen for playing guitar is not what anyone would call spectacular, and somewhat dims in comparison to the musicians he plays with regularly, in his band and beyond. However, I can count on one hand the number of other modern acoustic players out there who have come up with as many unorthodox yet highly melodic licks as Dave Matthews has. Before this letter turns into the Great American Novel, I'll challenge any rabidly anti-Dave fan to come up with ten good reasons why he sucks so much, and to provide his or her own "professional" and "sophisticated" view on what constitutes a good musician. I'd also challenge the editors of this site to not censor this letter and, frankly, I'll be suprised if it even gets posted seeing as how the opposing view is virtually unrepresented. Sincerely, ---- From: "Matt Mazzenga" ---- Date: Mon, 26 Jan 2004 Dear DMB impassioned: The last commentator asked for more reasons to dislike I think Dave Matthews himself has talent and has written some damn good songs, though not lately. However, he chooses to surround hmself with completely uninteresting musicians like Tim "The Wanker" Reynolds and whoever that violin player is who is always on coke and plays one note. Moreover, his concerts are bad, boring, repetitive, poorly produced and designed to make as much money as possible. Plus he's fat. But it's also his job ... and why do we care so much anyway? If he sucks, don't listen. I just saw the "Dave and Friends" show ( I went because it was my friend's birthday and also Trey was going to be there) and it was horrible. Also, Tim Reynolds is so bad. That's it. Peace. ---- From: "Joseph Staton" Hi- I'm not going to beat up on Dave Matthews or DMB. The one thing I think everyone can agree with that wrote in to complain is this: DMB has so many rabid followers that you're not ALLOWED to question the solidness of their musicianship or artistry. If you don't like them, then it's a major character flaw in your music appreciation or understanding. Well, I don't like Dave Matthews, I find him boring and unoriginal. But that's me... What you shouldn't do is turn into the DMB evangelical minister and beat me up about it thinking I'll "see the light" through your persuasive logic. I'll never convince my wife to like Bob Dylan's voice, and no one can make me like DMB... -- Joseph Staton ---- From: dale@dmbsucks.com
This is regarding the article by Gianni RandomSchtuff (which I assume is a pen name). I have hated Dave for years. I still do. I registered the domain DMBSucks.com several years ago, but do not have time to keep it active or post material. I was hoping the author of the article would have some interest in taking it over. I will transfer it for free as long as someone will take care of it and spread the obvious word of Dave's sucking. Once again, DMBSucks.com is yours for the taking if you choose. Glad someone sees it my way. -- Dale ---- From: "yard" (Poland)
Hi! I've read that article and all the comments. I must say I'm a bit shocked. I didnt realize how contrary opinions there are on DMB and how 'polarized' is its status in USA. I'm a musican and I'm from Europe where DMB is marginally popular (he wouldn't sell even one stadium gig in Poland where I live for sure -- possibly he could sell one club gig in capital city -- Warsaw). First of all I must say I like their music a lot. The musicanship of all band members is top grade -- especially drummer and bass player and Dave himself for his unique acoustic guitar style. The band has perfect and recognizable sound, good groove. They write great songs with unexpected structure and many ideas well beyond musical ability of typical 'rocker'. Still, despite musical and arrangement complexities, they write catchy and melodic tunes. Sometimes to write a pop song that sells is harder than to write a 30-minute suite of alien gritty sounds that is supposed to be 'sophisticated' work of true artist. The jazz/fusion background of DMB musicans takes rock music to totally different level of musicianship. I don't like bands who sell their inabilities, lack of musicality and poor ears as 'alternativness' -- I perceive them more as a con artists than as real artists -- they are usually good at talking about why their music is so good and they know how to amaze journalists. You can say "my music is a blend of Enstruzende Neubauten, the Swans, Frank Zappa and Bartok," and journalists are drooling ;) I run through all the arguments against DMB stated here and I must say that to me they are more a social kind than musical kind of arguments. I don't live in USA and I'm not aware what is trendy and what's not and I don't know your reality. So I'm not biased toward any of social 'groups'. It's stange that opponents can't say anything on WHY the music sucks -- they concentrate on supposedly stupid, low IQ people who like Dave. Mass popularity cannot be only reason that the music sucks. Just look how relative it is -- here in Europe DMB is virtually unknown by masses. Among fans here it's perceived as highly sophisticated, alternative band. He doesn't tour Europe cause he wouln't sell a gig... strange isnt it? Best Regards! PS. Excuse foreigner's grammar ;) ---- From: CaityDid3233@aol.com First off, who ever said that those "case in points" EVER happened????? Oh and what's this about?? Quote "I'm not surprised that a talentless artist such as Dave Matthews sells millions of records because, in fact, most of the people that sell millions of records pretty much suck." I'm pretty positive that you COULD NOT get a group of six random guys who play those instruments and do EXACTLY what they do. And they DON'T SUCK. Every single person in the band, and even the crew behind the scenes who make them look VERY good, are EXTREMELY talented. If you couldn't already tell, I'm a huge fan and I'm going to completely back them 100% on this HORRIBLE site. I know that Dave Matthews writes 99.9% of his songs along with his fellow band members. I completely DISAGREE with this site and I feel so bad for every devoted fan who views this site. I have grown up with this amazing band. I never really appreciated their talent until this year. Their songs do not get old because they are different ever time you see them in concert. They do their solos on the fly and just goes with the flow. This rock band has strange lyrics (Dave!! haha) but who cares!?!? If the UNEDUCATED IDIOT is basing his article and opinion on that, then that's sad. All that matters to me is the mesmerising music. I am 15 years old and have seen DMB in concert one time in my life so far. I have been to other concerts and DMB puts on one of the greatest shows EVER! I love this band. They are extremely UNIQUE in every way. How many rock bands include a very talented violinist and a sax player??? None that I know of except DMB. Dave Matthews himself even has said that it's the talented people playing their intruments and the crew working around him that makes him look good. He grows on you and you can't let go. Most of his songs he plays in concert extend into ten to twenty minutes long sometimes. I know this because I have EVERY CD. They are amazing. I hope I made a point clear enough to DMB haters that DMB is real and very good. God Bless and I hope DMB haters open their eyes and realize that this is the only real music out in the world right now!!! LATERRR! OH AND THEIR NOT POP! THEIR JAZZ ROCK!! Sincerely, Caitlin J. DMB ROCKS!!
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